[ elena could turn off her feelings, if she wanted to. it would be easy, just like flipping a switch, and then she would feel nothing. all she would care about is her own survival, and what she has to do to ensure it. but that's a cheat and a lie, and elena doesn't like to do either of those things, and certainly not to herself. she's done lying to herself about her feelings, no matter what they are. for the longest time she lied about being in love with damon, and then she cheated herself out of feeling the pain of jeremy's death. she's not going to cheat herself out of feeling the full brunt of damon's too.

she's surprised when d'artagnan calls her, but answers quickly. ]

CALLING: gilbert.elena@cdc.org

I'm alright, for now, but I appreciate the gesture, d'Artagnan. I'll probably just drink a bit and allow myself one last day to mope. Damon wouldn't have wanted me to stop living just because of him. I tried not to, anyway, but I guess I just didn't try hard enough. I'll be better after this, though.